Reading Resolved2worship's blog this morning was just what I needed... someone who has been there, done that, and can understand the stay-at-home Mum's job completely.
I only have two boys - energetic, creative, and willing to climb walls and attempt dare-devil stunts. I do however feel like I have four boys, some days eight! They move so fast, I can't keep up, my home looks like a world war went through it.... minus the blood, maybe more like a tornado - but I just cleaned it, really, I did.

As we were going to bed last night Ryan told me he had total confidense in me, that my career was going great, and that I was going to go far. I flopped down on the bed and said, "Oh babe, but it's so hard juggling the boys, work, the house, and everything else". I've had a few meltdowns this week, I think to myself "this is nothing, I can do it -- people do much more then this and somehow manage to have a life besides that."
I don't know how they do it, really -- I want to be super Mum, up at six - house cleaned, breakfast ready, kids dressed, day organized, and enjoying my kids before nap-time... shoots edited and ready within hours not days, because I'm not getting up and down constantly with the demands of two little boys. No scheduling shoots around sitters, daily life, baseball games, and everything else.
I think to myself - I've worked so hard for this, I want this more then anything... why can't I balance it all, why can't I do more?
I push, push, push myself -- we need this, I don't want to go get a job, I don't want to be away from my husband and kids, I don't want to give up my love for Photography, my dream of having a career.
There are days I truly am content, I love my life... and then I fall off the mountain into the valley and I cannot keep my head above the water. This week has felt like I've been struggling to breathe - we'll get through this thing, we'll get to the top somehow. We're hard workers, but curling up in bed and sleeping life away seems much more appealing.
Somehow I need to dig down deep, find that soul to survive and push through the crap in life, and get to the cherry on top.
Life is full of everything - and it's okay to have a bad day, bad week, or bad month.
I'm a stay-at-home Mum, I love my kids, I love being here for them and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I am blessed in so many ways - and I'll get there, I just need to keep pushing through the clouds.