....and the body is crashing... there has been a nasty virus going around, and we all caught it, despite my best efforts at staying healthy the inevitable happened. It's the kind of cough/cold/sinus funness that is hard to get rid of, I'm on week four of pulled muscles (from coughing), no sleep, and over all ickyness. Just when I think I'm getting better I get my period... I'm sorry if that is TMI, but for me... for some reason that nasty little gift always seems to sink my immune system even lower, so low in fact that I woke up with a cold sore and no voice. This is my very low. I'm so tired of being sick and miserable on my precious weekends that I asked Ryan yesturday to google how to get better... sadly, there is no cure, but to ride it through.
I think it's easier being sick as a kid, you stay in bed all day if you like, your Mum brings you orange juice and toast in bed, and you don't have to worry about responsibilities, work, ...etc...
In my perfect world, the government pays for and supplies a chef, nurse, nanny, and chauffeur for every sick parent -- oooo and compensates pay for sick leave! =D That right there would get me all the votes, I know it! :)
Must press on... think about supper tonight, try to keep on top of the house work, organize schedules for this week, prepare for photoshoots, make it to appointments and run errands... I often find it all overwhelming - and I think most of it is my mind getting carried away and believing it's much more then it is. More often then not adding things on to my week can be overwhelming to the point of panic mode and I'm really trying to change that. I don't understand why this is a trigger for me. My goal is to take on something for someone once a week. I more often then not say "no" to activities, to help a friend out...etc... not that I don't want to help them out, don't care, or anything like that -- I feel like I just cannot do it and I have no answer for why. Maybe the answer is just deep down. So.. it's kind of a big deal, but I'm running an errand for a friend in Calgary this week. My first thought is, do one thing for one person outside of my family, once a week. Try to break out of this emotional/mental slump, my second thought was, "how can I get out of this?" It is NOT a big deal, it's the smallest, easiest thing to do and I find it overwhelming. So I'm doing it.
There is so much I don't do in my life that I want to do, and then approached with the opportunity I shrink back into the corners and avoid it. I'm sure I'd be a therapists dream to analyse!
It would be great to find some resources on this - any recommendations?
Well it's Monday, and as far as Mondays go today is 'so-so'. Rhys doesn't have school today, which is nice in a way. He entertains Keegan, and I can wear sweats and not worry about what I look like. :) My goal for the day is to keep these kiddos on their toes so I can maintain some sanity, and finish editing. My game plan is book reading, lego playing, finger foods for lunch (makes lunch time more fun, and lasts longer), a new batch of playdough (always a highlight), some craft time, and then right when we are nearing meltdown central which happens to be the hour before supper I'm going to put on a movie. I think this game plan is child proof - wish me luck!! ;)
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